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Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Snubbins

Second to being a mother, I think being a nanny is the best job in the world. Which is why it's my career. Not because I get to play in the park on a perfect fall day, make potions out of dirt, eat fruit squishies, or witness mile stones, but because I see first hand the difference I'm making in someone else's life and feel the difference in mine constantly.

I love the pure joy that spreads across Jasper's face as I walk through the school to pick up his younger brother mid-day. The second he sees me from across the yard, he jumps up and down and shrieks "Oh! Oh! Sawah! Sawaaaaah!" And as I quickly pass I am greeted by flying kisses, waves and smiles that mirror my own. Is there a better way to start the day? I think not.

Unfortunately, many of those around me do not share that notion. I'm often be-littled, disregarded and looked down upon the instant I respond to that standard question "So, what do you do?"

This leads to one of two scenarios: I'm either immediately embraced or swiftly snubbed.

One day last year when I picked up Jasper from school, he came out with one of his classmates. We all ambled down the street and I began to talk with the other care taker.
"I'm Rose," she said, "Teddy's Grandmother".
"I'm Sarah, Jasper's Nanny."
No sooner had the "N" word escaped my lips did her body go ridged and her kind Grandmotherly skin tighten into that angry expression you get when you've snuck a cookie without finishing your brussle sprouts.
"OH." she managed to squeeze curtly between her teeth.
Then, she took Teddy's hand, spun around in the opposite direction and hobbled as quickly as she could in the opposite direction. Once again I had been mistaken for Jasper's Mom, only to be a stand-in let down.

Up until a couple weeks ago, that had been the top snub of my career.
And then I went to Boston.

There was an LDS Education Conference in Boston that I attended over Halloween weekend. Closet church nerd that I am, I was really excited to listen to insight from Elder M. Russell Ballard (member of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles of the Church), Clayton M. Christensen (professor of business at Harvard), and David Neeleman (founder of JetBlue Airlines). Saturday morning, over 600 single adults swarmed the Marriot with the surface agenda of learning from the best and the hidden hope of maybe finding that one eligable bachelor or bacheloret to make all their dreams come true.

We were all assigned to groups and I was the first to arrive at table #43. Moments later a brown haired, striped shirt clad young man pulled up a chair. Usual intros ensue and then...
ME: Where are you from?
HIM: CT, by way of Yale. I go to Yale. You?
ME: New York City.
HIM: What do you do?
ME: I'm a nanny!
HIM: A what?!
ME: Nanny.
HIM: Oh-Ugh.
After which he turned his back and never spoke to me again.

I kept chanting "church conference, church conference, church conference" while conflicting voices were selecting some choice words likely not taught in any English class at Yale, and my fist was clenching and unclenching itself with a mind of its own.
Do you know how half his classmates got to Yale? They had good nannies!!!!!

It fascinates me that there are such strong opinions about my career choice from complete strangers. It's like being a stay at home Mom getting caught in the grocery store with her night gown on backwards and 3 children hanging off her as she struggles to reach diapers on the highest shelf only to find they're out of the size she needs. Shuffling to check out she is silently accused by the cashier of doing nothing all day and looking like a slob in the process. Only I double fail because they're not even my kids.

What's even more interesting is that I get offensive reactions from men the most. As if the fact that I'm a nanny and love kids means I want to get married and have twelve right then and there. Which I do, but don't underestimate my patience. I can wait until the third date if needs be! Then, there are the reactions of mother's who mistake me for a Mom, and then feel purposefully deceived once I tell them I'm not. It's a select few, but it happens.

If it weren't entertaining to watch the tortured expressions and conflictions and judgements from people I'd probalby be offended. Not to say I don't get annoyed, cause I do, but never offended. I love my job. It makes me happy. It centers my life and allows me to live in the best of both worlds--family gal by day, single gal by night! At the end of the day I make more money than that guy at Yale (who may not even be able to find a job with the way things are going right now) and I know more about raising kids than most of the Mom's sitting next to me in the sand box.

Snub all you want, I'll be on the monkey bars!

2 comments:

bobias said...

You are the most amazing person & Nanny. To all those who judge a big Screw You! I have seen you in action, not only with my kids but with yours & I am in awe of you. I want to be just like you someday ;op J,H, my kids & all the others are so lucky to have you in their lives. Both those close minded people wish they could do what you do & enrich the lives of so many like you do. I love you!

Krista said...

Yeah! What Val said! Boo! Hiss!

See you on the monkey bars!