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Saturday, February 14, 2009

Love Sick

Today being Valentine's Day, I had big plans. My best friend and cousin Amaya flew in from CA (and luckily didn't die in a plane crash while doing so) to be my date for the big Weekend of Love. We planned this over six months ago. I surprised her with tickets to Phantom of the Opera the night she got in, and for the Day itself scored reservations at the hottest most sought after restaurant in NYC: Waverly Inn. It is nearly impossible to get reservations there. They are so exclusive they don't have a phone line, only book 2 days in advance, and reservations must be made in person. If they don't like you they'll simply say no. Somehow I managed to not only score a reservation, but get one a few weeks in advance for Valentine's Day!!!!!!! Followed by a screening of "He's Just Not That Into You". I pretty much had the perfect weekend planned. What I did not plan on, was getting sick.

This morning I woke up with a horrendous stomach ache. I was hoping it was cramps, but distinctly felt it wasn't. I spent some quality time in the bathroom trying to rid myself of all bodily fluids from behind. When that didn't work I took a shower hoping the hot water would melt it all away. When that didn't work I tried throwing up but to no avail. Also on the agenda today was to go see "my" little girl, Sophie, who turns a whopping four years old on Monday. I don't want to talk about it. I've known her since she was 18 months old when I became her first (and thus far only) Nanny. She also happens to have the most adorable baby brother, Ethan, who came along after I was gone. I don't get to play with him nearly enough and obsess over him when I do. They live in Princeton, NJ. now and Amaya and I were going to spend the day with their family celebrating and visiting before our date night in the City. I was bound and determined to get out there. After a couple more trips to the bathroom, writhing in pain and dry heaving, I FINALLY threw up. It was the nastiest vomit of my entire life, and clearly revealed I had a nasty case of food poisoning from sliders I ate last night at my friend Amy's birthday party. Tears streaming down my face from exertion and my stomach no longer in knots, I emerged from the bathroom with a smile on my face.

AMAYA: Finally threw up?!
ME: Yep!!! I feel SO much better.
AMAYA: Happy Valentine's Day by the way. I forgot to say that between all the trips you were making to the bathroom. Not a fun way to start the Holiday.
ME: Yeah....I got Love Sick!
(At least my sense of humor didn't get flushed with everything else!)

I quickly finished getting ready, and we hopped into a cab bound for Penn Station. About 10 minutes into the ride, the pain came back. I ignored it. 15 minutes and I was doing deep lamaz breaths. 20 minutes I was sweating. 21 minutes Amaya was calming trying to convince me that I was sick and needed to admit it. 22 minutes and she was suggesting we turn around and go home and that I could see Sophie another day. 23 minutes the cab driver was turning around and Amaya was on the phone with Elad (Soph's Dad) telling him we couldn't make it. :(

The cab couldn't have gotten me home faster. I got sicker with every passing second and couldn't even talk for fear that I would throw up everywhere. My body was screaming at me to get rid of whatever was inside and I was clenching all orifices tightly so as not to explode all over the leather seats. When the cab pulled up I literally ran inside, dropped all my bags in the hallway, and let it all go in the bathroom. Followed by passing out in my bed and leaving Amaya to her own devices.

I awoke to Saltines & 7-Up next to the bed which I tenderly started consuming. No sooner had I done so than I spilled my cup of 7-Up all over my duvet and down comforter. This wouldn't have caused a fit of laughter had I not done the exact same thing the other night with Black Cherry Soda and had a meltdown about it staining my comforter and refusing to wash it and being so sad that after 7 yrs I wouldn't be able to give it a proper goodbye but instead have to send it to the trash. Luckily, I was convinced to wash it and it all came out and my tantrum had been for nothing. Even in my upset state though, I made it clear that I had no intention of stopping the habit of eating/drinking on the bed. And then, the very next time I did so, I spilled AGAIN! It was hilarious and we laughed really hard (between pauses of pain and worry I might throw up).

Now here I am, blogging from bed. Feeling much better and BOUND AND DETERMINED to make our dinner reservation tonight. I may not eat, but by golly we are GOING!!!!! I'm bummed enough that I let Sophie down, I refuse to sacrifice my hard earned reservations!

Happy Valentine's Day! :)

2 comments:

A. said...

LOL, oh, how I love you.

Have you noticed I am sitting at least 10 feet from you? I'm still mildly concerned you may projectile vomit on me. ;)

Glad you're almost feeling a bit better. I heart you, my super hot, albeit sick, Valentine!

Col said...

Now that is a great Valentines Day story... a true heartbreaker.

Hope you are feeling better.